Life After University: Internships & Seeking Digital Marketing Career/Role.

Life after university…

Let’s just say it hasn’t been an easy one! As I always wanted to document my journey, this blog post is based on just that. My aim is to help and inspire those of you who are also in the same position, to keep striving and reaching your goals.

My Internship.

As some of you may know if you read my blog posts. I started an internship last year in digital marketing for a very luxury fashion brand. I was extremely excited and ready to get into the field of work even though it was unpaid. I was also applying to many paid jobs at the time but kept on getting rejected/ignored. Meanwhile, I was quite frustrated and bored of not doing much with my time except waking up and feeling very unproductive. Quite fortunately, I was successful at the interview (one of the best interviews I’ve ever had because I felt so comfortable and knew what I was talking about) and decided to take on the opportunity and gain experience in my field.

When I first started I really enjoyed it and some of the colleagues I met along the way. There were many other interns like me in different departments, So I was never alone or feeling left out. Gradually, I got the hang of it and built a routine which I made sure to follow on my days at work. For example checking and updating their social media platforms, responding to emails, etc, the usual. Furthermore, my manager and other colleagues in my department would allocate tasks for me, but they were quite straightforward and didn’t really need too much thought. I always finished my tasks quite quickly so I ended up having a lot of spare time at hand.

Weeks went by and I started to feel unchallenged, Idle and bored. I was always asking for new tasks as I wanted to learn so much more and felt that my capabilities were much more than they expected of me. I felt like I was disturbing my manager as she became really distant and less responsive. It just felt awkward and uncomfortable. Bearing in mind I hate those kinds of situations, especially in the workplace. It got to the point where I didn’t even want to go in, because I knew I wouldn’t be given anything or much to do and I will just be at my desk tapping and sitting in front of the google screen or trying to write a blog post without anyone seeing me do so, haha!

Don’t get me wrong, I know I needed to use my initiative at times and create new ideas myself but as an intern you need support, you need to be taught the things you don’t know and the things they don’t teach you at University. However, this wasn’t really the case in this situation.

I must not forget, for over a month I wasn’t even given an actual desk and computer that was sufficient for the work I was given. Do you remember those exam desks in secondary school? My desk was even a little bit smaller than that with no space to write on, nowhere to store my little bits at work. It was so uncomfortable. Some people wouldn’t mind this, but knowing that you are not the only intern in the company and everyone else has a proper desk and working space/facilities sufficient to them, your thoughts would be…why am I different.

Long story short I really started to hate going into work and dreaded every day, knowing that I wasn’t learning anything much and not even getting paid for the hours I had put in. I decided to hand in my notice within the second month (meant to be 3 months), but to be honest, I really stuck it out for the 2nd month because I was so ready to leave. I knew I wasn’t being challenged and I knew I wasn’t physically being taught anything that I didn’t already know. So I left and it was the happiest decision I’ve made! I felt free no longer confined and working 7 days a week (because I had to work part-time in the weekends to pay bills and travel etc).

Jobless, Broke and Unhappy

So as you can imagine going from working 9 to 5 every day to no job was one of the worst feelings ever. I felt like I was back at square one! Nevertheless, I kept going, applying, getting rejected because I still didn’t have enough experience” at this point I was very frustrated that I took time out of my own week to work, unpaid and to still be unable to get a job. After a while, I stopped applying and started focusing on myself my blog and just bettering myself and the skills I already had. That’s where I started spending more of my time creating and improving my content.

I was randomly searching for marketing courses and came across Digital Grads, a graduate tailored platform that prepares you for a position in the marketing industry. I really enjoyed using my time to complete this course as it made me feel like I was working towards a goal. I was still working part-time during the weekends in retail but dedicated my weekdays solely to myself and personal development. Whilst doing this I barely applied for that many jobs and most of the job interviews that came my way were companies who reached out to me.

These companies looked amazing to work for and had such a good reputation in the industry. I strived for the interviews and really put in the work. One of them involved a presentation, which I’ve never had to do before in an interview but I really wanted this job, so I made sure to put effort into it.

Feedback came through 2 weeks later I was frustrated because they made me wait so long to say, “You were great and we really loved you but you didn’t have enough experience compared to other candidates”. At this point, I was just like why me? I went for another interview for a very successful media agency somewhere I would have loved to work, again. The first interview went well but guess what the feedback was: “we really liked you, but we feel like you would get bored after a while” wow. I’ve never heard of such a thing in life, I think I should at least have an input into whether I’d feel bored or not. They then suggested other roles and made me go through a second interview, oh and I forgot to add, I had to do tests for this specific company. I attended the interview, received feedback a week after poor communication on their end “We just feel you didn’t have much experience to other candidates” Oh My, at this point I was tired of hearing the same thing again after going through probably 20 or so interviews.

The Breakthrough!

One morning I got a call from the course (Digital Grads) I was doing, saying that they have a job opportunity for me and If I’m available for an interview asap. Although I felt very disheartened, upset, extremely not excited or hopeful. I stuck it out and went for the interview. Surprisingly I smashed it, I didn’t even feel up for it that day, I felt so down and hopeless. But I definitely, expressed my potential and what I have done and experienced to get me where I am today, me being totally real, how I grew my own platform out of nothing, how I started a blog 4 years ago and gained a good following but wasn’t proud of or confident in it, deleted it and started all over again.

It paid off. Every. Single. Piece. Of. Struggle. Was for a very. Good reason! I’m now happily working in the field of work that I always dreamed of in the position I never expected to be in as a self-starter. I am so grateful and I really hope this inspires you to keep going” Attaining and achieving your dreams, striving for success, even in the times where you feel like no one understands you or sees your potential. Let me tell you. SOMEONE SURELY WILL, JUST BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!

I know this is a long one but, as always, I hope it inspired, helped and encouraged you to keep going and believing in your situation. Have faith that you will overcome and achieve.

Thank you so much for your support and reading my blog.

Thank you to the team at Digital Grads for continuously, supporting me and encouraging me to keep going till the end! (This is not sponsored content, I just really recommend it to those of you who are looking to go into a digital marketing career, but have no idea how to).

Till next time…

Letting the bad go & the good flourish…

I have to be honest and say that I really enjoy writing about real life experiences, it just feels like I’m able to help and reach out to someone on a more personal level, even though I may not know them personally. I was really just going to make this a Fashion Post/Outfit of the Day (OOTD), but I love expressing myself on this platform and discussing passionately certain situations/experiences I have faced even though it can be hard sometimes.


The Background Story

So where do I start? Last year ended on quite a bad note for me, but also in a way, a positive note, I let go of a very long, hard and serious relationship. One where, yes I’m sure you heard it all before, “I thought this was the one, it’s going to last forever” type of thing. 2 and a half years. Someone who most definitely changed my life, my perspective on everything in general. Although, the relationship wasn’t all bad and there were many good times, ones that I will always cherish. It was definitely a situation where there was a cycle, a pattern of destruction, that I just never came to terms with. I always had hope that it will get better, no matter what anyone said to me. I definitely guarded that relationship with everything I had because I wanted it to get better and spend the rest of my life with this person. Now when I look back, I know that I fell deeply in love… for there is no other word to describe how I felt about him and what I was able to tolerate.

When it was good, our relationship was amazing but damaging and explosive when it was bad. We brought out a whole new side of each other’s personality with the way we argued, maybe if I was the one looking from the outside into my relationship, I would say toxic. But I was always drawn back and fond of the amazing moments that were made during our relationship. We were just young, hadn’t discovered or “found ourselves”.

As a result of all this, my self-esteem, self-confidence, insecurities all found their way of making me feel less of the woman I was. Something just didn’t sit right with me and my conscience. I just knew that I really changed and turned into a different person, everyone knew me as this fun bubbly and energetic person. Especially in my first year of university, I was so confident. Not to say I wasn’t at all the entire relationship, but I could definitely feel that my insecurities heightened. My confidence was gradually decreasing and my self-esteem was poor.

Being the over-thinker and the emotional Cancerian star sign that I am, my emotions were heightened on a massive scale during this relationship. I had never thought of myself to be much of a crier, but during this time, I cried with all my heart when things got too much, I must say, that I too was shocked at just how much one could cry over a man. Often after crying, I’d sit, think and analyse everything. This led to resentment and grudges being held over things we never fully resolved. As you can imagine, feeling this way for a long period of time is not only physically draining but more importantly mentally exhausting. I could never forget the things he did to hurt me. That’s when I knew that this was not ok, I was settling for less than I deserved.

Getting out of this relationship is probably the hardest thing I have ever done. I often doubt my decision to leave and found myself thinking ‘what if I just continued pushing through?’, ‘what if he was eventually going to change?’, ‘maybe I could have fixed him!’ but then i eventually came to terms with the fact that he was never going to change and if he was, it wasn’t going to be for me.


I have to say and give it up to all of my friends for putting up with me during this confusing but difficult period in my life. I have to say everyone tried to tell me and warn me, but I had an attachment to this person. I kept believing and having hope in him. I just saw potential. I appreciated my friends and their advice, but I honestly do believe that you have to be in a place where you are ready to let things go for yourself. You have to make the decision to choose your sanity over the person you claim to love. No one else could ever make that decision for you but yourself. It’s very hard though because everyone who cares for you knows your worth and wants the best for you and to be happy.

But if it’s not your time to let go, you will not do it until you are mental, physically and emotionally ready to do so. There were moments where I couldn’t and didn’t want to tell anyone about anything I was dealing with or going through in that relationship. Distanced myself from people and everyone because I felt embarrassed and ashamed and just knew that the more I vented my feelings about the situation the more I felt like people would judge me for my actions, I know its bad but its true. When people are telling you things and you just don’t want to believe it, you just distance subconsciously.

I and my best friend of 6 years, grew apart for many reasons. She saw everything I had been through and couldn’t understand how I still wanted to stay in the relationship. I now understand how hard it must have been for not only her but everyone who cared for me to see me upset over the issues in the relationship most of the time. It definitely took a toll on some friendships as I found that I couldn’t really confide in my ex as much as I would have liked to. The more arguments the more emotionally distant he would become and so would I. This then led to me confiding and venting to my friends, which isn’t always the best option depending on the type of friends you have but, it gives you another perspective on the relationship from someone on the outside looking in.

As of recent, we re-kindled the friendship and little did we know were both experiencing heartbreak around the same time but due to us not talking we never actually knew. I must say our friendship was tested many times during the relationship, but we always bounced back no matter what.

What I have learnt?

  1. I learnt a lot about relationships with people in general.
  2. I learnt about myself, my personality despite going through it.
  3. It made me value the company I keep, who I let into my space. The people I surround myself with.
  4. It showed me my potential and how I can love when I genuinely have feelings for someone.
  5. It taught me the importance of self-love.
  6. It taught me how I need to work on myself and make myself whole before I choose to let anyone into my life like that again.
  7. It taught me that I want to be independent and stable on my own before I choose to be with someone.
  8. It taught me that I can be an emotional person
  9. It taught me what I want, need and cannot tolerate.
  10. Despite the negatives, I grew and developed, It made me stronger and would not say I regret anything.
  11. It brought me closer to God by trusting in him throughout the process.

This was a very long one but I hope you felt something from reading this and hopefully I am able to reach out to someone going through a similar situation.

Comment below and feel free to discuss with me as I love it when you engage with my posts, also look out for more topics related to this. Coming Soon…

2018 Goals: 10 Ways to Self-Love.

I could have easily given myself New Years resolutions this year, but I found something that works for me and habits I’ve implemented every day.

I’ve been reflecting on last year and how I overcame obstacles that occurred in the previous year. One of the things that came to mind was self-love.


Last year I went through and experienced a lot mentally, physically and emotionally. I saw a change in myself and my personality. I had a lot of doubts and low self-esteem (although sometimes I project otherwise). I became really low during university last year and even towards the end of last year. I just had thoughts that would come and go. Being the over-thinker that I am is very unhealthy at times because I could just drift off into my thoughts, sometimes even in the mist of hanging out with friends.

Towards the last year of university, I became more to myself and most times alone. Preferred my own space and company. I drifted apart from some friends during university, which kind of set my mood back a bit. I just wasn’t prepared for it or for that kind of experience, it was more confusing. Not like primary school days where you have little disagreements like “I’m not your friend anymore” but 10 minutes later you’re friends again. It was awkward and strange because you’re older now and you actually have to come to terms with it. Lol.

How I dealt with/overcame it?

Through all of this, I managed to keep myself distracted by working out at the gym whilst at university and focusing on my final year projects/exams. Even though it was hard to concentrate at times, I got used to it and it became a distraction. It then hit me once I was graduating again that “wow. I can literally count everyone I call a “friend” on one hand.”

What did I learn?

I have to say from this experience I learnt that I cannot please everyone by doing what is expected or the norm. But I wanted to be open and free to do as I please (of course not upsetting anyone in the process). Not to mention, I did doubt myself and what I did to lose the friends I thought I had, but I realised that I actually gave everyone the same love that I would give to anyone, I take the word “friend” very seriously. I used to, try to please or make everyone happy, which can be counterproductive, because like I said you cannot please everyone.

How I’m going to embark on making a change?

This is why I have chosen to dedicate this year 2018, to myself and giving myself the love that I gave and lost. At least I think I owe it to myself.

  1. Meditate/Pray (I incorporate both)
  2. Read more books! (The People Factor by Van Moody is a good one, especially for relationships and friendships)
  3. Go on walks, Clear your mind
  4. Network meet new people (I’m loving attending workshops, especially when they’re about digital marketing or empowerment) download Meetups or Eventbrite
  5. Journalling (Five Minutes In The Morning, The Focus Journal) I got mine from Anthropologie thanks to Micah and Lizzie!
  6. Pamper Myself (Get my nails done/my hair)
  7. Treat Myself (with FOOD of course or a new piece of clothing or a book, whatever tickles your fancy) I take myself to eat as well and hang out with friends. This helps me to come out of my thoughts, be myself and appreciate the people I do have around me.
  8. Blog more, Post More, Shoot more! This gives me a boost of confidence and just makes me want to push myself to be the best version of myself. Putting out content is one of the things that make me happy and really gives me an outlet to showcase a talent or two.
  9. AFFIRMATIONS! I can’t stress this enough, it’s hard, I’m still learning myself tbh but you need to compliment yourself! I remember when I used to think a compliment should only come from someone else, but, that’s not true. You also need to give yourself credit and praise yourself for being you and what you have achieved.
  10. Travel/Explore – Hopefully to travel more and experience new cultures and invest time into the things I love!

Overall I would definitely have to say positivity and perseverance have helped me through the hardest of times I’ve faced. I believe in spreading and affirming positivity into your life as what you do put out into this world will manifest. So amongst all these things I’ve listed, LEARN to train yourself to be as POSITIVE as ever. Even when it’s hard. (Trust me I know, how hard this is) but once it becomes a habit you will appreciate it more.

I really hope this will help you, to conquer the year and start right! As these things have really helped me, I’ve implemented most of them (as you may have noticed), but my aim is to travel more!

I would honestly travel the world and just try new food all day long and review hotels for a living lol. Maybe someday…

Disclaimer: I’m just being real and honest about what I’ve felt and gone through, hopefully, this helps someone!

Let me know if you have any questions or anything, also send through any topics or content you would like to see soon. Drop them in the comments or email!

Outfit Details

Coat – New Look

Bag – Zara

Knee High Boots – Select Fashion

The Realities of Life After Graduating…

Hello again!

I come to you as a Woman Lol (I joke). A blog post has been pending but writer’s block has seriously been stopping me, lately. But I’m here now, I don’t know where this post is gonna lead to but a few things have been kicking off lately.

Let’s talk about graduate life…So I’ve literally been applying non-stop since July, been to a few, but not many interviews. The struggle is that everyone expects you to have experience! I’m fresh out of university looking to, GAIN EXPERIENCE and I get told I need to have experience. Okay. Well, this was not what I anticipated.

I mean I wasn’t even keen on looking for unpaid internships but it’s become an option. I’m so ready to get stuck in and learn a lot about my career. However, the requirements sometimes, are out of this world. I’ll probably sound like I’m babbling on right now but it’s true.

You never know how badly you want something when it feels like you can’t have it. But the underlying factor of this is making sure you PERSEVERE! I’ve put my mind on applying every day without fail. Even if it’s just one job, Its something! The number of rejections I’ve had is devastating but that little voice in the back of my head just says, “Bose that’s not the job for you, keep going!”. Once I put my mind to something I GET RESULTS!

Just had my interview with Vivienne Westwood yesterday and It was literally the best interview I’ve ever had, I’ve never felt so free and confident before. I prepared, I knew a lot about the company, but I love how they made it more about me, my motivations and my experiences. Rather than testing me! Must give a shout out to the team at Vivienne Westwood.

I woke up this morning in awe of the email I got stating that I’ve been offered the position! I was over the moon! *Inserts Track – Post Malone – Congratulations* I must say this is God! Giving me the willingness to push through even when things are tough!

I’m not even writing this post to boast about my opportunity but I was thinking of this post for a while now and I was Just about to write about the struggles of how hard it has been and the realities of Graduate Life… So I hope some of this post will inspire and motivate you guys to pursue whatever you want!

So let’s move on to… LIFE AFTER UNIVERSITY WITH NO STUDENT FINANCE. Let me tell you the BROKE life is real after university unless you have secured that salary job, times are really hard out here. I mean, I’m working during the weekends but that’s not even enough, I’m grateful to even have a job but the fact that it’s not in the field I want is a total bummer.

I think that’s another thing that drives my motivation! I wanna keep moving up no matter how hard or long it’s gonna take like I said DON’T GET COMFORTABLE WITH BEING COMFORTABLE.

Don’t get me wrong the competence and demand out there is so crazy right now it can put people off. But you can and You will, There is something out there for everyone and we just have to put our mind to it!

One thing they don’t tell you is that not everyone has their shit together once they Graduate, A couple of us are still here trying to find ourselves. And honestly, that’s Okay…To be honest just because you have graduated don’t feel the pressure of having to get into something for the sake of it. Find out your true passion and pursue it! Its so easy to say let me just get this job because I need money now, but honestly whatever is for you will eventually come to you, just believe in it!

I could probably ramble on more but, I think you already get the gist ha ha! Sooo….

To sum up this post, the moral of the story is… I’ve learned that “All That Glitters Is Not Gold” likewise “Being a graduate is really not what you think it is”! It is what you make it…I always underestimated the fact that Life after University is hard but I believe it now.

I really hope you understood where I was coming from In this post and I hope to get through to one or maybe even two of you, who have read this post!

Let me know some of the things you have learned about similar scenarios, I would love to know down in the comments section!

Outfit Details

Top, Sunglasses & Earrings – Primark

Jeans (I rolled up) – Next

Shoes – New Look

Love From, Bose x

Just A Little Thought …

So I have come on here right now on a random Monday evening casually thinking of different things, having various thoughts running through my head/mind. Listening to my ultimate fave artist Jhene Aiko – While We’re Young. I’ve been thinking of doing a slightly different post for a while now. Ive had such an extreme year, which has taught me a number of things and lessons. Ive had ups and downs that have made me who I am today. Lost a couple close people, been in situations where I wanted to be totally disconnected so I didn’t have to face or deal with certain situations. It was the hardest thing ever. I don’t think my character and personality has been tested so much on so many levels. The only thing that kept me going was being distracted by so much university, work and the gym. Which has done me well TBH! LOL as I’ve achieved a 2:1 overall in my degree and a whopping 1st class in my dissertation.

Some people have asked me how did I manage to do it and I tell you, I actually don’t know. Like, there were so many ups and downs during my degree. I’ll have times where I’m upset and I just couldn’t be asked to write 100 words out of 9,000. I think my motivation was really just telling myself to get out of my room in the ‘Unhappy’ mindset I was in and just pick up my books and study.

So I’d head to the library as that was the only place I will force my mind to keep at it. My supervisor was alright, but she didn’t give me all the advice I needed. It was more like I had to read between the lines lol. Although, I’m so grateful for what I achieved. Another motivation tip for me was, watching motivational videos like Brian Tracy, TD Jakes, Marie Forleo and some others. (If I remember I’ll update this post) They really helped me to stay on top of things. I also believe in channelling the energy that has brought you down to pick yourself up! For example, having a good nights sleep after a rough time or day and waking up early, having breakfast, doing your makeup or something to make you feel better and heading straight to the library.

Like even though so much has happened, I’m grateful to be alive, to be moving on with life and finally understanding and appreciating what I have now. It’s sometimes hard to be happy and content with things when everything feels wrong. But I’ve learnt that being grateful is everything and you slowly begin to appreciate more even when things are tough.

St Lucia really changed my perspective on life, after seeing my grandmother who has been ill for years. It really sank in that there is more to life than stressing over everything, its uncontrollable for you to be able to have everything perfect and that is fine. Everyone learns differently at different times and in different situations. I could go on forever, but I hope you kind of get what I saying here Lol

I’m honestly proud of all the achievements I had made this year even though the year hasn’t even ended. I’ve really come a long way with myself and I’m incredibly glad to have created an amazing platform to share this with myself and others. Its still in the growing process but I know it will get there. Some of you may know that I used to have a blog in my first year of university, which gained over 1,000 views in 1 and half years. It was a big achievement for me because I constantly saw it growing. However, I wanted more and I wanted Better! Sadly I came to the conclusion of deleting that blog and starting over hoping to create a brand new, professional layout and design. My content was limited, mostly fashion. Which I do like, don’t get me wrong. But it wasn’t everything to me. I wanted to incorporate, food, beauty, lifestyle and most importantly Travel. Anyways Long story short. I created this, which I absolutely LOVE. My own domain and my own layout! What an achievement!

Lastly, I would like to thank my friends, most of all for motivating me and supporting each other through everything, because we all started somewhere and now we are all doing what we want to do, moving up! They also have blogs, you should go check it out:

Benedine <3



“Channel the energy, that has brought you down to bring yourself up!”